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"I will sing to the Lord for He has been good to me" - the end of the headache story

"O Lord my God, I cried to Thee for help, and Thou didst heal me." Psalm 30:2

I've been thinking about this post for awhile, and during my quiet time this morning, I was reminded to "ascribe to the Lord the glory due to His name" (Psalm 29:2). This will probably be my last post about the headache saga, and gratefully it is because the Lord has healed me!

A brief recap (if you don't know about the headache saga you can read my posts from 2011 - 2012 and get the full story): in April 2012 I decided to stop taking medicines for the headache because nothing was helping and everything was giving me side effects. It was scary and a relief at the same time. Scary to think I was without a lifeline, and a relief to no longer feel the desperation of trying to fix the pain.

But God showed me His faithfulness and peace like never before. I still struggled with headache pain through 2012, but once Ben and I got married there was a gradual diminishing of symptoms. I think I only missed one or two days of work in 2013, and had only a few other red days. At some point I realized that my head was no longer my first thought in the morning, and I wasn't having to make contingency plans for missing work or events.

Honestly one reason it's taken me so long to write this post is because I was afraid the relief was fleeting and that bringing attention to it would ruin everything. But I've gone months now without incapacitating head pain. I do have some pain on an inconsistent basis but nothing too terrible, and nothing that makes me think it will ever return in full force.

I'm so grateful, and I'm ashamed that I've been so quiet about this release the Lord has granted me. I just want to share a few treasures that God has given me through this process that may be of some comfort or encouragement to someone else.

First, you can trust Him. Even when it seems like He's forgotten you or punishing you, you can trust that His love for you will never change and He is orchestrating everything for your good. (Isaiah 49:13-16, Psalm 119:68, Romans 8:28).

You can withstand more than you think, but you need to give up sooner than you think. I can't tell you how many times I was at my breaking point physically, emotionally, and spiritually. But I don't think God was trying to increase my tolerance for pain and suffering as much as He was trying to teach me to surrender immediately and completely. I always felt like when I said (through tears and gnashing of teeth) "I give up! I don't know what You want from me!" that I was failing and faithless. But He was so quick to sustain me with His Word: "My grace is sufficient for You, for My power is made perfect in weakness." (2 Cor. 12:9).

He's a really good God. His ways are higher than our ways, and His thoughts are higher than our thoughts, and that's hard for us to accept, because sometimes things really hurt and look bad and nonredeemable, but He knows what He's doing and He will never let the righteous fall. You're safe with Him. (Isaiah 55:8-9, Psalm 55:22).

Suffering allows us to see a whole other dimension of God that you can't get to know any other way. Looking back to the month prior to the headache, I was on a mountaintop, spiritually speaking. I was so enamored with God and earnestly wanted to know Him more and bring Him glory with my life. He honored that prayer in way that knocked the wind out of me and took me a long time to comprehend, but I am forever changed and blessed because of it. Don't be afraid to go into the hard places with God.

Thank you for those who walked beside me and carried me through that season of my life. Sorry this update was so long in coming. Your prayers and encouragement and help were invaluable to me and I love you all!

I heart word art!

Word art is my art of choice. I wrote this little poem this morning and turned it into a printable word art using PicMonkey and this tutorial. I also transformed our Family Roles images into word art on PicMonkey using this technique so that I could print them as 5"x7" photos for a collage frame we have. Also, this one of our family values:

In other news, we will finish our foster parenting classes next week, which just leaves some minor home repairs and 2 home visits, and then we will be licensed!

Family Mission Statement and Family Roles

Today marks 10 months of marriage! We've certainly enjoyed our time together this year, and we've tried to be mindful about setting a good foundation for our marriage and family in our habits, plans, and routines. We spent time working out our family mission statement. This wasn't as easy as I expected - we each had opinions about the structure and function of this type of project, and we had to find ways to fit our ideas together into a cohesive and concise statement. So, here it is in its 2013 version (I can't promise we won't make changes to it at some point!): 

The Steele Family

Mission

We are enlarging and enriching God’s family in our generation.

Vision

We envision a large household of sons and daughters who all serve Jesus with their gifts and will continue the growth of our family.

We see a large household of faith that has benefited from our example in marriage, is growing in Christ’s likeness, and is impacting the world with the gospel.

We see a lasting influence and a material inheritance for our children through debt-free living, continuous saving, and generous giving to God’s work.

Values

Do things that matter.

Make each other a priority.

Do what you promised to do.

Influence without demanding or nagging.

Be inclusive to those who don’t have a family.

He who fears the Lord has a secure fortress, and for his children it will be a refuge. Prov. 14:26

Additionally, we came up with Family Roles that will help us relate to one another, particularly as we prepare to add children to our family. No - we are not pregnant! But we are in the beginning of the process of becoming foster parents through Lee County DHR. We anticipate completing the preliminary training, homestudy, background checks, etc by Spring 2014. Our family roles are: Leader, Helper, and Learner. Ben taught a wonderful lesson in his Timothy series this Spring about the roles of men and women in the church and that helped me solidify our family roles. For each role I wrote out the different titles they might wear (Husband, Father, Wife, Mother, Son, Daughter) as well as tasks they perform (reading, preaching, cooking, learning) and what they need to perform their roles well (rest, quiet, nurture, structure, surprises, responsibility, play). I used tagxedo.com to create these images - it's free and easy to use! I will probably be printing these out to frame and display alongside our mission statement.

Our favorite recipes - thanks Pinterest!

I've enjoyed browsing Pinterest for meal ideas, particularly of the Crock Pot variety since we don't have a working oven (only toaster oven), and it's nice to be able to come home to a meal that's ready (or nearly ready). So without further ado, a few of our favorite recipes:

Crock Pot Spaghetti Sauce

Adapted from Chocolate & Carrots

Ingredients

1.5 lbs ground beef or turkey
1 tablespoon olive oil
1/2 cup frozen chopped onion
1/2 cup frozen chopped green bell pepper
3 cloves garlic, minced
1 (14 oz.) can diced tomatoes with italian seasoning, drained
1 (14 oz.) can tomato sauce
1 (28 oz.) can crushed tomatoes
1 tsp. garlic salt
1 Tbsp. chocolate syrup
1 Tbsp. Italian seasoning
1/4 teaspoon freshly ground pepper
dash of red pepper flakes

Directions

In a pan, brown the ground beef and add it to the crock pot.
In the same pan, sauté the onion, green pepper, and garlic until tender. Add to the crock pot.
Put the remaining ingredients into the crock pot and stir together.
Cook on low for 8 hours, stirring occasionally.
Serve over your favorite hot noodles.

Note: I freeze half the sauce for Crock Pot Lasagna.

Crock Pot Lasagna

Adapted from The Girl Who Ate Everything

Ingredients

Leftover spaghetti sauce (from above recipe)
1 (16 oz.) container ricotta cheese
1 (8 oz.) package cream cheese, softened
2 cups mozzarella cheese
1/4 cup grated parmesan cheese, divided
1 tsp. garlic salt
1 egg
6 lasagna noodles, uncooked
2 tsp. dried parsley flakes

Directions

Line a 4-6qt Crock Pot with a Reynolds Crock Pot Liner, or spray with cooking spray.
Mix ricotta, 1 1/2 cups of mozzarella, cream cheese, 2 Tbsp parmesan, parsley flakes, egg and garlic salt in a bowl.
Spread 1 cup spaghetti sauce in the bottom of the pot.
Place half of the noodles on top of the sauce (break them to make them fit).
Spread half of the cheese mixture over the noodles.
Spread half of the remaining sauce over the cheese mixture.
Place the rest of the noodles on top of the sauce.
Spread the rest of the cheese mixture on top of the noodles.
Cover the cheese with the rest of the sauce. Place the lid on the pot.
Cook on low 4-5 hours.
Sprinkle with the remaining cheese and cover until it melts. Let it stand 10 min. before serving.

Note: Do not cook on high or overcook. We usually have this for Sunday lunch so that it only cooks for the recommended time. I make it on Saturday and put it in the fridge so that I don't have to do the work on our day of rest.

Crock Pot Santa Fe Chicken

Adapted from SkinnyTaste.com

Ingredients

24 oz (1 1/2) lbs boneless/skinless chicken breast (I've also used boneless chicken thighs)
14.4 oz can diced tomatoes with mild green chilies, undrained
15 oz can black beans, drained and rinsed
1 cup frozen corn
1/4 cup chopped fresh cilantro
14.4 oz can fat free chicken broth
3 scallions, chopped
1 tsp garlic powder
1 tsp onion powder
1 tsp cumin
1/8 - 1/4 tsp cayenne pepper (to taste)
salt
Toppings (optional): shredded cheddar cheese, sour cream, jalepenos, hot sauce or salsa.

Directions

Combine chicken broth, beans, corn, tomatoes, cilantro, scallions, garlic powder, onion powder, cumin, cayenne pepper and salt in the crock pot. Season chicken breast with salt and lay on top.

Cook on low for 10 hours or on high for 6 hours. Half hour before serving, remove chicken and shred. Return chicken to slow cooker and stir in. Adjust salt and seasoning to taste. Serve over rice or tortillas and your favorite toppings.

Note: Ben and I have eaten this several times. Add some rice and wrap it in the biggest tortilla you can find, and it's very similar to a burrito at Moe's or Chipotle. It's also great on tortilla chips as nachos.

UPDATE - One New Favorite!

Saucilious Slow Cooker Pork Chops

Adapted from Chatting Over Chocolate

Ingredients

4 boneless pork chops, cut in half width-wise
1/2 pkg. baby carrots
4-8 red potatoes (depending on size), quartered
1 can cream of mushroom soup (I've used regular and 98% fat free - couldn't taste a difference)
2 tsp. Worcestershire Sauce
1/4 cup ketchup

Directions

Line your large crock pot with a disposable liner (Bed Bath and Beyond has packs of 8 "Slow Cooker Savers" for $5 - yay wedding gift cards!). Put the potato quarters in the bottom of the pot. Layer the baby carrots over the potatoes. Lay the pork chop pieces on top of the carrots. In a medium sized mixing bowl, combine the last three ingredients. Spread the sauce over the pork chops. Cover and cook on low for 8 hours. We serve this with Sister Schubert's frozen dinner rolls that are pre-baked and ready in 10 minutes! Our favorite rolls!

Ice Cream Supper: What I'm Learning about Sabbath

Backstory - I grew up in a family that spent the bulk of our Sundays at church. We would often ask on the way home from the evening service, “What’s for supper?” Usually it was answered by my mom with, “It’s every man for himself,” but occasionally, she would let us have “ice cream supper”. I’m not sure how often this actually happened, but enough that it had a name. Everybody would fix bowls of ice cream and popcorn (my mom’s two favorite snacks) and sit down at the table with a section of the newspaper (we were only allowed to read at the table on Sundays). It remains a very pleasant memory.

Present day – Ben and I have been married for two and half months.  February was a whirlwind month for BigHouse, and building momentum with Mosaics, the college group we’re leading from our church. We scheduled a breakfast date to discuss how we would intentionally observe the Sabbath. We listened to an insightful sermon prior to the date and were prepared to discuss the flow of our year – busy seasons and times for rest – and we wanted to pinpoint some ways in which we would make a day of rest in our week.

We anticipate that in the future Ben will be engaged in full-time church ministry (exciting! And daunting…), and we know that Sundays will not always be a day of rest, but for now, since we are both working weekday jobs, it seems to make the most sense to set aside Sundays. Up until two weeks ago, we were doing work related things during the week, and family/house related things on the weekends, but never seemed rested. We learned some great truths about the Sabbath that we want to put into practice in our lives:

1) God created man on the 6^th day, and then rested on the 7^th. God didn’t need Adam’s help with any of His work. The Sabbath reminds us to enter God’s rest prior to entering into His work.

2) Observing God’s holy day reminds us that He is holy, and He has called us to holiness also. This is a day when we come apart with Him and see Him for who He is.

3) The Sabbath is for our benefit, but it’s not about us. Isaiah 58:13-14

As I’ve been thinking about it, and now practicing it for two weeks, I realized how much my family’s lifestyle growing up instilled Sabbath rest. We rarely went anywhere on Sunday besides church – even out to eat. We all took at least a 1.5 hour nap. We didn’t do homework or a bunch of chores. We ate simple meals that didn’t make a mess in the kitchen (hello – ice cream supper!). And after we went to bed at 8pm, my parents faithfully sat down together and took communion. We were never invited to participate in that, but it really gave me a sense of security to know that my parents were praying and worshipping together in our home.

So this is what our Sabbath looks like in the newly formed Steele household:

•  Have household duties completed prior to Sunday.
• Get enough sleep on Saturday night that you can fully participate in worship on Sunday.
• Spend individual quiet times with the Lord in the morning.
•  Everyone fixes his/her own breakfast.
• Listen to a sermon podcast while getting ready for church.
• Attend Sunday School and worship service.
• Eat a simple lunch (prepared in advance or quickly put together).
• Use paper plates (we don’t have a dishwasher).
• Watch a sermon or other teaching video together (we are total sermon nerds).
• Take a 1-2 hour nap.
• Attend choir practice and evening worship.
• Eat a simple supper.
• Have a family planning meeting to discuss the upcoming week.
• Take communion together.
• Encourage a culture of Sabbath rest among God’s people by not shopping, going out to eat, or planning meetings or parties.

It has been such a blessing to us in the past two weeks. We feel so productive during our work week, and then blissfully at ease on Sundays, not rushing into a new week with unfinished business. I would encourage you all to spend some time studying God’s Word concerning the Sabbath and finding ways to make it more restful and God-centered. 

Wedding Bells Are Ringing!

It's been a while since I've updated, but I was waiting to have some big news. Here it is:

Ben and I are engaged!

Of course we've been talking about marriage since our first date, and in mid-August he asked me, "So, hypothetically, if I proposed by the end of September, when do you think we could get married?" I told him probably like March (2013) because it was getting awfully close to the end of the year and I'd pretty much given up all hope of getting married in December (my original timeline). After further discussion I asked him when he thought we could get married and he said, "I want to get married this year." HELLO! He was also adamant about being married before Christmas (I'm now wondering if he wants to be sure to seal the deal before the world ends on Dec. 21...haha), so we had tentative plans for December 15th.

With a condensed time frame, we went home to Fairview on Thursday night before Labor Day so Ben could talk to my dad. Funny story - we left pretty late in the evening from Auburn to drive home (5 hour drive) and  so it was 11:30 PM when we came cruising into Franklin. I got pulled over by one of the superfluous Franklin police officers patrolling Hwy. 96 (going 50 in a 45). This was the conversation:

Officer: Are you living here or just visiting?

Me: Just visiting

Officer: How long have you been visiting?

Me: I mean, we just got off the interstate, so about a minute.

Officer: Where are you headed?

Me: Fairview.

Officer: THAT'S an interesting place...population: nothing.

Don't worry, I did not get a ticket. We saw three more patrol cars before we got out of Franklin! Nuts.

Ok, so Ben talked to my dad for an hour and a half the next morning. I was definitely eavesdropping. He said yes! (of course) So then it was just a matter of time (precious time) before he proposed. I had put (too much) pressure on him from the beginning about wanting a good proposal story. After all, it is a story I will tell for the rest of my life! So poor guy was struggling to come up with something good, in a hurry.

His best idea was to propose during a Kids' Night Out (BigHouse respite event) since that's where we met. Unfortunately, the timing was bad because they are only once a month. And I was getting really nervous about the days slipping away. On Thursday night prior to the proposal he said, "We should plan our weekend so we don't end up wasting it. Actually, we should go ahead and plan all our weekends (through Dec. 15)." I said, "Ben! If we are are going to be planning all our weekends we NEED to get engaged this weekend!" (I'm so patient.)

On Saturday, my head was really bad (it woke me up at 3am! yuck.), and I was miserable because he had to go into work to finish a project that morning so I didn't get to see him until 2:30. Fortunately by that time my head had calmed down some. We went to the Overall Co. which is a super cool coffee shop in downtown Opelika. We hung out there for awhile and then went to his house. It was really nice outside so we decided to finish the book we were reading together (Things I Wish I'd Known Before We'd Gotten Married by Gary Chapman).

After we'd finished reading he started talking about our first date and how much I mean to him, and I knew it was coming! He got down on one knee in front of where I was sitting and said, "I would be honored if you would be mine forever." I said, "Absolutely!" He asked, "Will you marry me?" I said, "Yes sir!" He presented me with Bucky's engagement ring to wear as a placeholder until my ring (pictured) came in the next week. He had gone to Jewelry By Design to have a ring made similar to the other ring that Bucky had also bequeathed to me. My ring is made up of the same stones that were in her ring - I think that's neat!

Neither of us felt magically different that evening, but I can tell you that now I feel even more connected to him and secure in our relationship. I can't WAIT to marry this man! We'll be getting married on Dec. 15th at our church in Opelika. We've gotten a lot done so far, but still have things to check off the list. I'm sure you'll understand if I don't update the blog until January or so!